The post describes a newly divorced father struggling to care for his 3-year-old daughter’s curly hair during the weeks she is with him. To help with the situation, the father asked a teacher at his daughter’s daycare to do her hair in the mornings if he dropped her off earlier. The teacher provided him with a list of curly hair products to buy and tips for washing and caring for them at home.
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However, when the daughter told her mother that her teacher does her hair and that she goes to school early to make it happen, the mother accused the father of “relying on a teacher to do [his] job” and messing up their morning routine. The mother called the father a lousy parent, and he now wonders if he was wrong for seeking the teacher’s help.
However, the teacher doesn’t seem to mind doing it, so it’s not a problem for anyone involved other than the daughter. One Redditor states- “NTA. If the teacher doesn’t mind doing it — which, by the way, is very generous of her, and you should get her a very nice gift for her trouble — then I don’t see why it’s an issue.”
The father seems to be trying to learn how to care for his daughter’s hair but is still struggling, which is understandable given that he is a newly divorced father. Therefore, seeking help from the teacher is a sensible decision, especially since the teacher has experience with curly hair and is willing to provide guidance.
It is also important to note that the mother was unwilling to teach the father how to care for their daughter’s hair, making it difficult for him to improve his skills. Therefore, it is still being determined why the mother reacted so strongly. Still, it may be because she feels that the father is not doing enough to care for their daughter in his weeks or because she is upset that her daughter’s routine has changed.
However, some Redditors are concerned that the teacher is pretending she doesn’t mind doing it but, in actuality, is just doing it for the child’s sake. Therefore, the teacher is likely underpaid and shouldn’t be given additional responsibilities outside her job description. One commenter states – “B*lls***. This teacher likely is underpaid. She’s not doing it because she enjoys it. She’s doing it for the kid. She cares more about the kids’ wellbeing here than the OP.”
Another commenter agrees, stating that the teacher is simply doing it to protect the child from embarrassment- “The teacher probably feels obligated to because she feels bad for the kid. She knows that the kid will suffer from embarrassment of being unkept, and she most likely also can tell why the mom left. Dads like this are exhausting.”
Overall, the father is trying his best to care for his daughter’s hair, and seeking help from a professional is a good solution. The father could take further action to educate himself- after all, it’s doing hair; it’s not impossible. He could learn but is choosing not to. The mother’s reaction seems unwarranted. It would benefit both parents to communicate and work together to meet their daughter’s needs.
Source: Reddit