OP’s son, Jordan, had had a troubled relationship with his stepmother, Natalie, since she came into his life when he was 16. Jordan never saw Natalie as his mother and refused to let her get close to him. He even moved in with his aunt after Natalie and OP got married. However, over time, they started reconciling and seeing each other more often. Recently, Jordan got married and invited Natalie and OP to attend.
At the wedding, OP found out that Jordan denied Natalie a mother-son dance and instead chose to dance with his aunt. Natalie was hurt by this and told OP, who couldn’t help feeling irritated and upset? OP decided to leave the wedding with Natalie and later explained to Jordan that it was because of his hurtful actions towards Natalie. However, Jordan got mad and accused OP of ruining his day and causing a scene.
OP believes that Jordan hurt Natalie’s feelings for no reason other than to be malicious and that he should have followed the tradition of having a mother-son dance. However, Jordan and the rest of the family sided against OP and said that they shouldn’t have left the wedding no matter what.
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Understand The Situation
There are many Redditors that have taken a stand again the OPs position:
‘YTA. Your wife has never been his mother, and he has every right not to have a mother/son dance with her. I strongly suspect this isn’t the first time you’ve chosen your wife over your son, and is probably why he moved in with his aunt.
If you want any kind of relationship with your son going forward, I very much recommend both you and your wife apologize for throwing a tantrum at his wedding.”
This is a complicated and emotionally charged situation, but that does not mean the truth should not be told. This commenter is highlighting to OP that this woman is not his mother; she is his wife.
It appears s if OP does not understand that he has hurt his son in his actions and marrying another woman. This is exemplified by his efforts to move out when he was originally married.
Beyond this, after his son has made amends with his partner, he is still confused about why he still does not think of her as his mother. Then the OP prioritized his new wife over his son for the second time in the story.
His Family Are Right
Even OP’s family has chosen to support Jason in his decision over OP. This speaks volumes as it suggests that OP is deluded and is the only person that cannot understand the situation.
“He chooses to honor his aunt – who has guided him through rough teen years – by dancing with her. And you’re upset about this? HAVE YOU LOST YOUR EVER-LOVING MIND????
The family is correct.”
Rightfully, this Redditor notes that Jason respects his aunt as a motherly figure. She is a blood relative and someone who helped raise him from the age of 16. This is a more maternal figure compared to OP’s wife.
This comment also notes that the rest of the family agrees with Jason. Even though family dynamics are complicated, there are likely many more pieces to the puzzle. However, from what is described, it is clear that OP is coming across as ungrateful and misguided.
OP Is Being Childish
OP is not coming off well in the thread. He is very much acting like the child in this situation:
“So you made your son’s wedding all about your need for your wife to get a mother-son dance with him. Then you left when you didn’t get your way. And you don’t see YTA.”
This statement is harsh but accurate. OP has made the whole situation about him and his wife rather than his son. It appears to be a running theme.
OP has made all of the decisions his son made about him and how it affects him. However, he needs to step back and look at why Jason made those choices and try to repair their relationship in the long run.
Source: Reddit
