OP recently found out about their parents’ adultery and has posted about it after obtaining suggestions from a direct message. In it, OP deliberates about how their parents’ actions affected their life.
Their Parents Didn’t Want to Spend Time With Them
OP reveals that their parents frequently missed important events in their life, such as games and birthdays, under the guise of working late, but OP now realizes that their parents just didn’t want to spend time with them.
They Caught Their Mother With Another Man
OP also recalls a traumatic incident where they caught their mother with another man, resulting in a panic attack.
She Left, and Dad Provided No Comfort
Despite begging their mother to stay, she chose to leave and return to the other man’s house. OP feels let down by their father, who didn’t provide any comfort during this ordeal.
Their Hypocritical Behavior Was Damaging
Additionally, OP shares that their parents told them to focus on their studies and not date while simultaneously engaging in extramarital affairs themselves. OP feels ashamed of their own sexuality due to their parents’ hypocritical behavior.
He’s Seeking Therapy
Lastly, OP begged their parents to stop seeing the other people for a month, but they resumed the behavior afterward as if nothing had happened. As a result of their parent’s actions, OP has decided to seek therapy and will not invite them to their upcoming wedding.
He’s Cutting His Parents Out Of His Life
Family is always a complicated topic, and this one is no different. It is a confusing situation having to deal with the difficulties of cutting parents out of one’s life. Therefore, it is important that the OP going forward, focuses on themselves and their partner.
Let Your Wedding Day Be About You
“No, let your wedding day be about you and your partner. You don’t want to be worrying about your parents on a day that should be full of joy and set yourself up for more disappointment if they let you down again.”
You Are More Significant Than Your Parents
This online user makes an excellent point. They are suggesting that OP is more significant than their parents. They must commit to making their special day about themselves and their partner.
Don’t Make Your Wedding Day About Them
OP’s parents have already been cut out of their lives, so it is important not to make the day about them. It is understandable that they are thinking of their parents, but there is a reason they cut them out in the first place.
You Will Regret It If You Focus On Them
Many commenters are in agreement that OP would be doing themselves and their partner a disservice by focusing the day on them. OP will likely regret any thought that they are not the focus of their special day.
Your Parents Are Absolutely Disgusting
There are some understandably strong opinions in the comment section. Many are taking aim at OP’s parents for the poor conditions that they were raised in:
“Your parents are absolutely disgusting, and so are the commenters telling you to get over it. They were dishonest about everything – family values, family time, and their marriage. Everything. I would never be able to forgive them. These narcissists made your life hell and neglected you.”
Online Users Condemn Other Commenters
This online user is even condemning others in the thread who are not taking the OP’s comments seriously enough. Moreover, they move on to rightfully not all of the parent’s severe indiscretions.
Are OP’s Parents Narcissists?
Although there is not enough information to make the assessment, this commenter goes as far as to suggest that OP’s parents are narcissists. This is an extreme accusation, but based on OP’s story, perhaps there is some truth in it.
Online Users Share Their Wrongdoings
They have clearly valued their own lives and the experiences of their child. Therefore, it is to be expected that a number of commenters are happy to highlight their wrongdoings in OP’s defense.
He Needs Professional Help
OP clearly has a lot of unresolved issues regarding his parents, and online users suggest that they seek professional help.
“Have you looked into telemental health therapy? I wish you well in your new life. Going no contact, for now, will help with your healing. They are who they are, and that’s not going to change.”
A Rough Childhood and Some Space and Time Needed for Mental Health
This comment sums up a lot of the sentiment in the thread. OP has had a rough childhood and would benefit from some space and time to consult their mental health. This is a very complicated situation that will likely require long-term help.
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