We all love a good wedding story, hearing about the romance of the day, the fancy food, and the fun dancing. However, not all weddings go according to plan, as was the case with one recently discussed on Am I The A**hole (AITA).
A weddinggoer explained how he went to his sister-in-law’s (SIL) wedding with his wife and expected things to be slightly strained due to family issues. He gave a little background when he explained that his Mother-in-Law (MIL) and Father-in-Law (FIL) had divorced after 30 years of marriage and that the original poster (OP) had sided with the MIL after bitter revelations while the rest of the family sided with the FIL who quickly remarried.
While the MIL was not invited initially, the OP’s wife persuaded her sister to change her mind and allow her to come. However, she was not to be a part of the wedding ceremony or the rehearsal while this was deemed acceptable to all; the OP and how the wife was unhappy that the MIL was to be seated at the back of the ceremony while the FIL and his wife sat in the front row with the OP and his wife.
The OP took it upon himself to escort his MIL down to the front to sit next to his wife while he took the back seat instead. The OP’s wife brought her mom into the shot during the pictures to feel included. Still, her sister took offense and caused a scene, insisting that she did not want her mom in any of her wedding pictures.
Everyone was Uncomfortable
The OP said that the entire wedding was awkward and uncomfortable, and the other guests felt lots of tension. The next day, a change of venue was made for the wedding breakfast, unbeknown to the OP and his wife, who were not invited. When the OP did catch up with his SIL, she told him, “Your wife is a real b***h for what she did.”
This was about the seating arrangements, as she was angry that he had taken control of her day. She went on to talk about how stressed the OP and his wife made her, and this stress was also felt by his wife’s brother, who chastised him afterward.
Did he Overstep the Boundary?
There was some empathy with the OP’s situation; he was trying to protect his MIL’s feelings, but ultimately, people thought he overstepped. One person wrote, “You’re still an a**hole for pulling this little stunt, especially at a wedding. A wedding is literally the last place to intentionally stir up drama.
Which is what you were doing.” Another comment agreed, saying, “Agreed with all of this. You and your wife may disagree with SIL’s choices, and that’s fine, but it was NOT your place to decide where MIL would sit at SIL’s wedding”.
Some posters agreed that there was something off about the whole arrangement but insisted that it “was probably not the time and place for this. The most you could have reasonably done would be to sit at the back with the MIL to keep her company instead of in your designated front seats.”
We can’t help but agree with this and feel that the OP’s heart was in the right place. Still, he went about things the wrong way, and now there is a lot of healing to do after being shunned by the majority of his wife’s family.