OP is a 32-year-old woman who is very close to her 28-year-old sister. When OP found out she was pregnant, she discussed it with her sister. Together they decided not to tell anyone else and agreed to keep the news from their parents until her sister’s wedding. OP’s sister suggested that she could announce OP’s pregnancy at her own wedding so that she could be part of the special announcement. Despite a difficult first trimester, OP kept her promise to wait before she let any of her family know the exciting news.
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The Big Day
When the wedding came, it was clear that OP’s sister had decided not to make the announcement about OP’s big news, most likely because she wanted to keep the attention on her for the entire day. OP and her husband were hurt, but they then decided to tell their parents quietly during the wedding instead of a full-blown announcement so they could share the excitement with OP’s parents.
No one else in the family found out until a week later when OP announced it on Facebook. The sister later learned from their dad that OP had told them the news on her wedding day. In response, OP’s sister was furious and accused OP of making her wedding about herself. She hasn’t spoken to OP since and refuses to see her new nephew. OP is unsure if she did something wrong and asks if she is in the wrong.
OP’s actions seem reasonable, given the circumstances. She kept her promise to her sister until her sister changed her mind, and then she told their parents privately. Understandably, her sister is upset, but it’s also important to acknowledge that OP went through a difficult first trimester and needed support from her family.
It Didn’t Go As Planned
There have been several intense discussions via the thread. However, many of them are sticking to one position. They believe that OP’s decision was not selfish and that she did the right thing. She only did so because she knew that if her parents kept it secret, then the wedding would not be ruined:
“NTA. I was all set to say you don’t announce that at a wedding, thinking you grabbed a mic and told the whole wedding. You didn’t. You told your parents. Just them. And it didn’t create a fuss at the wedding because your sister didn’t even know until a week later when your parents told her.”
Initially, people assumed that OP made a show of her announcement to the entire wedding party. Quite the opposite. She just wished to share the news with her parents and effectively follow her sister’s wishes to keep it quiet, even though her sister broke their agreement.
The Sister Was Manipulative
There are some Redditors very much on the other side of the fence. They suggest that OP’s sister has some explaining to do:
“Maybe cynical to think, but I think the same thing. Sister didn’t want attention on OP, so maybe she manipulated her into keeping quiet by promising the announcement and didn’t plan on doing it at all.”
It is reasonable to say that many believe that the sister planned to avoid any attention on her sister to keep it all for herself. It is a clever manipulation to make the OP believe she can reveal the big news. Then she was sidelined and told that it would not happen, which is difficult to argue against on someone’s wedding day.
OP Should Have Acted Sooner
Although there is a huge audience that suggests that the sister is in the wrong, there is another perspective:
“But I don’t know why you listened to her in the first place. You should have shared to your family on your timeline when you want to do so, not hers. It was all about her – she wanted to tell your parents and have that big moment as well and takes that from you for her to have the spotlight.”
There is a cohort of writers who suggest that OP should have taken the opportunity to release her announcement on her timeline, not her sisters. She should have done what was suitable for her rather than rely on her sister to be in control. If she had done so, she would have had a better experience revealing the news and potentially not gotten into an argument with the sister.
HIS STONE COLD GREED. WIFE TRAGICALLY LOSES HER PARENTS BUT HER HUSBAND DEMANDS INHERITANCE
Source: Reddit