OP is a 15-year-old girl who is friends with Gibby, who is openly gay and frequently cross-dresses and wears makeup and jewelry. Gibby is also forthcoming about his struggles with depression and his complex home life.
There Are Unseen Issues
Despite OP’s support for the LGBTQ+ community, she has noticed some issues in their friendship over the past few months.
Gibby Trauma Dumps
Gibby tends to make their sexuality and mental health their defining traits and often engages in trauma dumping, which exhausts OP.
OPs Problems Are Dismissed
She feels that whenever she tries to talk about her own problems, Gibby invalidates them by claiming that their problems are worse.
Gibby Thinks OP Is Privileged
She also feels that they are privileged and don’t understand what it’s like not to have money.
They Sexualized OP and Touched Her
Additionally, they sexualized OP and her female friends, made inappropriate comments, and touched them, making OP uncomfortable.
They Use Their Homosexuality as an Excuse
They have also used their homosexuality as an excuse not to be held accountable for their actions and often compared their struggles to those of OP in a dismissive way.
They Are Never There for Her
OP finds it frustrating that she is always there for them, but they are never there for her. Whenever she tries to criticize them, they accuse her of being homophobic. Furthermore, Gibby hates anyone at their school who OP talks to and can be embarrassing through his actions and what they say. Finally, they have told OP some weird sexual information about themselves, which she is not comfortable with.
Is She in the Wrong?
OP is unsure if she is in the wrong for feeling frustrated with Gibby and not knowing how to confront them about her issues with their friendship.
Readers Feel Gibby Is Out of Line
Given the detail OP included in their story, most of the thread agrees that Gibby is way out of line as a friend.
She’s Not His Therapist
“NTA. You’re supposed to be his friend, not his therapist or his punching bag. As a gay and also depressed person, I make a point to try to make sure I don’t trauma dump on my friends and I surely don’t do anything to make them feel uncomfortable.
His Sexuality Doesn’t Give Him a Free Pass
“His sexuality does not give him a free pass to be a creep or to say obnoxious/rude things. He’s just a bad person and you deserve a better friend.”
Gibby Should Not Burden His Friend
Clearly, this commenter can relate to the situation and Gibby. However, they have made efforts in their life not to be a burden to their friends. Something they believe Gibby would benefit from.
It’s a Cause for Concern
Moreover, they have rightfully added that uncomfortable conversations and touching are unacceptable to anyone. This should be a cause for concern and an indication that Gibby may be more manipulative and insidious than they first appear.
OP’s Reaction Is Justified
Most of the online users are in agreement that OP’s reaction is both justified and has nothing to do with Gibby’s sexuality or mental health:
“NTA sounds like you’re wanting to ‘drop him’ not because he’s gay or depressed but because he’s self-centered, rude, and invalidating.
Take a Break From Him
“I’d say you can tell him you need a break for a while, and if he’s interested in having an open, honest conversation to save the friendship, you’ll have it, but if he’s not, don’t. People who can’t take any kind of constructive criticism need to be the ones to open themselves up to it; unfortunately, ‘confronting’ them barely works.”
He’s Just a Nasty Person
Clearly, this participant has some firm opinions. They point out that Gibby’s behavior is not a manifestation of their trauma or preferences; it is purely an example of a nasty person acting out.
Take a Moment to Assess the Friendship
This online user makes the well-measured suggestion that they should take a moment to assess their friendship. This will allow both parties to take some time to reflect on what has been happening. OP will likely not go back to their old ways, and hopefully, Gibby will begin to see reason.
It Could Be the End of the Friendship
As they suggest, conversations like this can be too difficult for people to bare. In essence, they note that it could be the end of their friendship, but maybe that is for the best.
HIS HOA DEMANDS THE REMOVAL OF SECURITY CAMERAS: THEIR OVERSIGHT TRIGGERS A LEGAL BACKLASH, ENTRAPPING THEM IN A RIDICULOUSLY EXPENSIVE LOOPHOLE!
A couple bought surveillance cameras to monitor their property, which inadvertently waged a costly war with their HOA.
She Demands Her Brother Share His Daughter’s Inheritance With Her Stepdaughter – Who Wasn’t Bequeathed Anything!
When it comes to family dynamics, few things can stir up emotions, quite like inheritance disputes. A contentious situation has emerged in an unfolding saga that tests the bonds of blood and challenges the concept of fairness. At the center of this narrative stands a sister who adamantly demands her brother to share his daughter’s inheritance with her stepdaughter, who, to her dismay, was not bequeathed anything.
HE ISSUES AN ULTIMATUM: IN-LAWS MUST VACATE OR HIS DAUGHTER’S DOOR REMAINS LOCKED IN A HEART-WRENCHING POWER STRUGGLE
OP’s brother-in-law, Sammy, moved in with his twin daughters, Olivia and Sloane, after losing his home due to a divorce. OP’s daughter, Zoey, is 16 years old and gets along fine with her cousins, but they do not respect her privacy.