Blended families can be challenging to manage, even under the best circumstances. But when children from these families are ignored or mistreated, it’s no surprise that their relationships with their parents and stepparents become strained as adults. A young woman I’ll call Faith has faced this problem, and she’s made hard choices regarding her family.
A Fresh Start
Faith and her mom have been mostly estranged for the last seven years. Her mom has tried to stay in touch while Faith has withdrawn from the relationship. Faith’s dad passed away when she was four. He and her mom were not married but were together as a couple. Her mom leaned heavily on her dad’s family for a few years after his death before moving to a different area to start a new life.
An Unhappy Childhood
After the move, Faith’s mom met and married another man. On numerous occasions, they both told Faith that he was now her dad and she was to refer to him as such and not call him her stepdad. She was ordered to correct anyone else who used the term stepdad. Faith didn’t want to do this but was punished and berated if she didn’t. He said since he was taking her on as his daughter, the least she could do was respect him as her dad.
Negative Changes
When Faith’s mom and stepdad had kids, it became apparent that he never saw her as his daughter. She was treated differently from the other kids, yet she was still required to call him dad and would be punished when she didn’t. Her mom always sided with him, and Faith still resents her mom for not standing up for her. When Faith turned 18, she moved out and ended all contact with her mom and stepdad.
Family Estrangement
Seven years after moving out of the family home, Faith’s stepdad was diagnosed with a severe neurological condition, and her mom started caring for him. Faih’s mom asked her to come and help with him and support her half-siblings. She refused and told her mom after the way they mistreated her throughout her childhood, they no longer existed to her. Her mom accused her of being unfair, lacking compassion, and holding on to the past. Faith told her mom she had failed her as a mother and wouldn’t be moved to help her now.
Selfish or Self-Preservation
After this conversation, a family friend contacted Faith, telling her she should be ashamed of herself. While her mom and stepdad weren’t perfect back then, they were still her family. They accused Faith of only adding to the stress of a woman doing the most demanding job imaginable: caring for a sick loved one. Faith asked an online group if she was selfish for not helping her mom and stepdad in their time of need, and its members had a lot to say.
They Failed You
According to a group commenter, Faith’s mom and stepdad failed her as parents and disrespected her father’s memory. They forced her to call her stepdad a title he didn’t deserve; her mom failed to protect her and showed a preference for the kids she had with him over Faith. Now her mom has to live with her choices.
Make It Clear
Someone in the discussion emphatically states that the stepdad made it clear in every way possible that he wasn’t her father. Now it’s her turn to make it clear in every way possible that she is not his daughter.
Where Were They?
The family friend who chastised Faith needs to stay out of the family’s private business. Where were they when Faith was being mistreated by her mom and stepdad? Faith would be well within her rights to tell that so-called friend to help her mother out since they’re so concerned, somebody advises.
Selective Memories
“People have very selective memories of how things happened when it suits their needs. And do they need Faith or her money?” a contributor to the thread inquires. After failing as parents, they’ve decided to recognize her as part of the family now that they need help. Faith is free to walk away from them with a clear conscience because she owes them nothing.
He Sold the Family Home for Three Times What He Paid for It, but Now His Siblings Are Demanding a Share of the Profit
A man bought his two siblings out of their share of the family home when their mother passed away. Now he’s sold the house for three times the amount he paid for it, and his siblings are demanding a cut.
This Groom Invited His Ex-Girlfriend To His Wedding, But When She Showed Up In Suspenders He Had His Regrets!
Recently, a couple decided to have a micro wedding with just their immediate family, around ten people. They chose a venue known for holding significant events, but they hired a smaller room there.
This Groom Invited His Ex-Girlfriend To His Wedding, But When She Showed Up In Suspenders He Had His Regrets!
He Was Blinded by Love, Until He Learned About His Romanian Wife’s True Motives
In a tale fraught with deception and vengeance, a man recently divulged his experience of unmasking his Romanian wife’s infidelity and orchestrating a chain of events that ultimately led to the revocation of her Greencard, laying bare her hidden agenda.
He Was Blinded by Love, Until He Learned About His Romanian Wife’s True Motives