Difficult and unpleasant childhoods often influence our adult lives in subtle ways. We asked – what are the 18 small signs someone had a challenging time during childhood?
Over-Apologizing
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“This can be a form of peace-keeping and diffusing a potentially unpleasant situation. It is also common after experiencing an abusive relationship.”
“I picked [over-apologizing] up after living with someone that tried to control everything I did. It started gradually and got to the point of her flipping out and not talking to me because of anything.”
They’re Suspicious if Anyone is Nice to Them
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“Having difficulty accepting generosity.”
“There were lots of people early on in my life that would pledge their generosity but then get angry if I actually needed it. Made it really difficult to accept help for many years because those experiences made me afraid to be a burden.”
Extreme Levels of Independence and Self-Reliance
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“This includes not asking for help when needing it.”
“This is me. I will go out of my way to learn new things so that I don’t have to ask for help.”
People-Pleasing
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“This has caused me so many problems. I’ve been in very dangerous situations because I was nervous about making someone annoyed.”
This can include difficulty setting boundaries: “I have had to estrange from some family members. I wish I didn’t have to, but I also wish they didn’t want to do the things they did.”
Using Humor As A Defence Mechanism
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“They make fun of things that should not be amusing but rather alarming.”
“You develop a seriously dark sense of humor to survive. Sometimes laughing at the ridiculous (but tragic/traumatizing/deeply troublesome) situation is the only thing you can do.”
Inability To Cope With Stress
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“They shut down when they are too stressed or overwhelmed.”
“This is often because stress is associated with trauma/threat, and their brains are expecting to go into fight or flight mode during stressful episodes.”
Self-Care & Grooming Extremes
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“Self-care and cleanliness are either nonexistent or extremely important to them.”
“If it’s the latter, this can be because taking control of their physical care can feel like taking control of their life, which they may not have experienced in toxic upbringings.”
Food Issues
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“This can be hoarding, unwillingness to share, and other excessive issues.”
“On the other side of that, it’s also a sign that they care a lot that others eat enough but don’t eat much themselves/involuntarily good at fasting for periods for no damn reason at all.”
Compulsive Lying
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“Which is a textbook defense mechanism from a rough or abusive childhood.”
“I learned really early to not tell my father where I am actually going or who I am going with, just to avoid conflict or questions from his side.”
Self-Worth Struggles
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“Putting their self-worth in people’s acceptance. Continuously seeking reassurance and validation.”
“There’s a difference between being self-aware and another thing is genuinely not being able to believe that you are worth just as much as anyone else.”
Flinching
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“Particularly during physical intimacy or during arguments/heated discussions. This can include cringing when being touched.”
“Flinching at certain movements, like raised arms.”
Maturity
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“They seem to be more mature than the normal greenhouse raised.”
“Or it can go the other way, and they have a childlike naivete.”
Fidgeting
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“All my friends who fidget (crack knuckles, shake legs, pick nails) have bad parents, either abusive or absent.”
“This can also include impulse disorders, such as Trichotillomania.”
Difficulty Regulating Emotions
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“Emotional reactions that don’t match the situation… for example anger as a response to something that should feel good or rage or panic at something that is minor.”
“Not showing people emotions. In the sense that if something is bothering them, they’ll pretend to be okay. Mostly to not rock the boat or to avoid scrutiny. Even when there won’t be any.”
Hurting Themselves
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“Self-harm seemed like the only way to cope with emotions. It was the one thing I had control over even when life felt unbearable.
“I know people see the scars I gave myself several years ago and probably judge me. I don’t think they understand self-harming was the only way I survived the pain.”
Self-Critical
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“They are too hard on themselves when they make even the smallest mistake.”
“This is because they expect an onslaught from others, and getting in there first gives them a sense of control over the situation.”
Attention-Seeking
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“Unrealistic or multiple rapid requests for attention.”
“This can include negative attention by deliberately casting themselves in a bad light.”
Being an Over-Achiever
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“This is usually a sign that a child received a lot of criticism from their parents.”
“The school told my parents not to waste their money sending me to college but sent me to trade school. I was good with my hands. I paid my own way through 5 college degrees.”
STUCK IN THE 60S: 10 THINGS BABY BOOMERS REFUSE TO LET GO OF
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Memories of the “good old days” keep us trapped in the past. Baby boomers love to retell tales of how it was “in my day.” At the same time, millennials will tell them to get with the times. Being stuck in a time warp from which they don’t want to snap out of, here are things that baby boomers still think are fantastic.
STUCK IN THE 60S: 10 THINGS BABY BOOMERS REFUSE TO LET GO OF
16 ANNOYING PHRASES THAT MAKE PEOPLE IMMEDIATELY HATE YOU!
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We wanted to know the most irksome things someone can say that turn you off! These online forum users didn’t hold back!
16 ANNOYING PHRASES THAT MAKE PEOPLE IMMEDIATELY HATE YOU!
OBSOLETE MILLENNIALS: 14 SKILLS THEY LEARNED IN THE 90S THAT HAVE NO PLACE IN TODAY’S WORLD
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A lot has changed since the turn of the century – just ask this nostalgic lot!
OBSOLETE MILLENNIALS: 14 SKILLS THEY LEARNED IN THE 90S THAT HAVE NO PLACE IN TODAY’S WORLD
THE FALL FROM GRACE: 12 PROFESSIONS THAT WERE ONCE REVERED, NOW A TOTAL JOKE
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These 12 professions that are now obsolete show how much the times have changed.
THE FALL FROM GRACE: 12 PROFESSIONS THAT WERE ONCE REVERED, NOW A TOTAL JOKE
FROM ‘OKAY BOOMER’ TO ‘UGH BOOMER’: 10 HABITS THAT IRRITATE MILLENNIALS
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Each generation has its quirks. Most label it as an “old person thing” when asked why grandpa or grandma does something unusual. The defense from the other side is that “it was the way things were back in our day.”
FROM ‘OKAY BOOMER’ TO ‘UGH BOOMER’: 10 HABITS THAT IRRITATE MILLENNIALS
