Fathers always want the best for their daughters. They offer their “little princess” sage advice about life and boys. However, sometimes the guidance is senseless. In one popular online community, females share some of the inane advice their fathers gave them.
Stop Being So…Girly
Dads love their daughters as much as their sons. However, it may not sink in that girls are different than boys. As one woman explains, “I only wish that my father would’ve acknowledged that I’m a girl and it’s okay for me to like dressing up and that it’s okay to ‘throw like a girl’.” Girls can pretty much do anything that a guy can do. It’s just that girls do it in a feminine way.
Hand Me The Wrench
Spending time with parents makes for great bonding time. One lady says, “my dad would be working on his boat engine or something, and he’d say come help me with this, and then I’d sit on a bucket for 20 minutes watching him in silence, and finally wander off out of boredom.” Sometimes girls aren’t into the things their fathers are.
He’s Not Good Enough
When it comes to dating, fathers show a defensive side. One member reflects that “Treating every boy interested in your daughter as your enemy does both of you a disservice.” It’s understandable that your dad wants the best for you. But causing every boy to run for the hills has you heading for Lonelyville.
Oh No. You’re Becoming A Women
Puberty is a natural part of growing up. During this transition, a lot of girls become insecure. Fathers can make it even more awkward. One lady explains, “I felt incredibly uncomfortable about growing up because my dad made it seem like it was a bad thing.” Fathers must accept that their little girl is turning into a fine young woman.
I Wanted A Boy
When it comes to having a family, the sex of your baby is a gamble. There are some men who “If you spend a good portion of your daughter’s childhood talking about how much better and easier a son would be to raise.” With that attitude don’t wonder why your girl resents you.
I’m Sorry
It takes a lot of guts and humility to admit when you’re wrong. For parents, it can be harder to admit to your children you made a mistake. However, as one female says “When you do something wrong, apologize. Respect us as people and apologize to us.” Imagine the standard you’re setting for your kids if you expect them to apologize to you, but you don’t reciprocate.
Look At You
Girls can be sensitive about their bodies. A number of community members share the experience in which “As a daughter whose obese father remarked about my body and looks, It took a long time for me to think I was attractive.” Fathers who genuinely love their daughters don’t body-shame them.
Don’t Take A Photo
Photos are ways in which we can revisit the good times in life. Those precious moments mean so much. But, as a woman recounts, “Don’t be scared of having your picture taken, if your daughter wants to take pictures of you…My dad died when I was 13 years old, and then I realized that all of his hiding from the camera meant I was left with only a handful of photos, and he wasn’t in any of our home videos”. Fathers, don’t be camera shy.
I Need You
When a child feels neglected, or the scars can be long-lasting. One member shares, “My dad was giving me insults recently for not knowing how to do things. Like, how to change my oil or how to fix something. I finally piped up and said ‘How could I have ever spent quality time learning something from you when other kids were competing for your attention?’” Your kids long for you to hang out with them.
That’s Not The Reason
Fathers can sometimes use a stereotypical response regarding their daughter’s negative emotions. A user explains, “Not every instance of anger or sadness on my part was because ‘it must be that time of the month.’ My dad is a great guy all around, but used to bring that up (even jokingly) waaaay too often.” It could be a defense mechanism as the father finds it difficult to sit down with his girl and talk about how she’s feeling.
That’s So Hurtful
We are all guilty of saying things that upset the other person. When it’s a father making a comment about his “princess” the pain can be magnified. One woman cautions “That we take everything he says to heart and he has to be kind. His words can leave deep wounds that stay with her for a lifetime.” Dads, put a guard over the door of your lips.
We Are Watching
Children see the home environment as a reflection of the world. Kids model the behavior of their parents. “Our standards of how we expect to be treated by men come from how you treat our mothers.” Fathers, you have a huge responsibility of showing your daughter how a man respects his wife.
Where’s My Father?
Providing for your family is important but there are some fathers who make it the main priority. A woman reflects, “I’d rather have had a dad who was there, than a dad who was successful and a workaholic.” When you place work ahead of your child, it sends a message that the kid isn’t important to you.
Please Listen
It is said that men don’t like talking about emotions. Females are more open to discussing how they feel. The last thing a girl wants is a father who doesn’t understand that “Her feelings are real and valid. The problem she’s sobbing about, whether its a boy or a fight with a friend or whatever, may seem trival or silly to you but she those feelings are so important to her right now.” Be the shoulder that your daughter can cry on.
Empowering Fathers
Daughters, just as much as sons, want the love, attention, support, and approval of their fathers. As imperfect humans, dads will make mistakes as a parent. Be honest with your little girl. Be approachable. Be understanding and above all be there for her when she needs you.
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