And why it’s SO important to be a selfish mom!
When we have children, we tend to lose a little bit of ourselves, or our former selves, at least. This is the most normal thing possible, since we really aren’t the same person we were pre-kiddos. Even if you were a mom of 1 darling child and then became a mom of 2, you STILL are not the same person, wife, mother, or friend that you were when you were a mom of just 1. For those of you who may not have noticed, being a mom is a big freaking deal. We work our butts off to keep tiny humans alive, fed, clean, and happy. Oh, and if you’re married/cohabitating? Well, caring for our significant others tends to be a job in itself (has ANY man in the history of time EVER replaced the toilet paper roll?).
Frankly, we often find ourselves pushed to the absolute brink of sanity trying to keep up with hectic soccer schedules, homework time, healthy dinners, doctor appointments, laundry, general housework, bath time, and in my case and many others, a full-time outside of the home job as well! The best possible way to be the best possible mother?
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Get that pedicure!
Go all out and throw in the extra foot massage and manicure to go with it. Just because we put our children and families first doesn’t mean that we should neglect ourselves. You’ll feel so much better when you walk out of that nail salon. You deserve it.
Spend the entire day shopping for YOU!
I know, it is definitely easier said than done. I find it nearly impossible to go into a store and buy something for myself without feeling guilt for not spending that cash on my family. We have to stop this! We deserve to treat ourselves like the hardworking bad-asses we are! You deserve it.
Leave the laundry alone for the day!
It will be there tomorrow. Will it grow? Probably. Will it be slightly more work if you put it off? Likely. Will it be worth it to have an entire day without folding or hanging a single article of clothing or matching up one last sock? You bet it will. You deserve it.
Don’t you dare cook dinner.
It’s pizza night! Come on, even the healthiest and most dedicated families deserve a lazy night during the week. For me, my other half is always gone on Wednesday evenings so the kiddo and I have a pizza night! Mom gets to skip the dinner planning and executing, my little man gets pizza, and best of all? No dishes! Try it out, you deserve it.
Put those kids to bed on time (or early) and start that movie!
You know the one you have been meaning to watch forever but just never find the time? It’s time! Throw on your comfiest pajamas and grab your warmest blanket. This is YOUR time momma. You deserve it.
Add a glass of wine to your movie night for expert status!
The kids are fast asleep, you’re already skipping the laundry and have zero dishes… I can’t possibly think of a better time to indulge in that much-needed and HARD earned glass of Riesling… or Moscato… or Pinot Grigio…. you get my drift! Whatever you choose, you deserve it.
Take a long, hot, bubble bath… with the door locked!
I know, I know, us moms can hardly even PEE in peace, much less take a long bath. I get it. This is why it is a specific list item that I find to be incredibly important. Sure, you may need to arrange this with the hubby in advance or schedule it for JUUUUST after you drop the kids at school, but regardless of what goes into it, make this one happen! You deserve it.
Buy YOURSELF flowers!
Sure, it’s nice to receive flowers as a gift for a birthday or just to say “I Love You” but it’s also nice to just have flowers to look at in general. Something about their fresh scent and natural beauty has such a calming effect and can make the home seem so inviting. Who cares if you bought them for yourself? You deserve it.
Allow yourself a day at the salon!
I can’t think of many things that feel better than a fresh trim, blowout, and style to perk me up. Mom life is TOUGH stuff and it is so easy to lose sight of who we are as women. Let yourself feel beautiful and take an afternoon to be pampered while you sit on your butt for a change. You deserve it.
I sincerely hope that you will take this list to heart and treat yourself as a woman as well as a mom. It’s so easy to forget about ourselves, put ourselves last, or continuing to procrastinate our own well-being while putting everyone else first. Make a conscious effort to schedule time for YOU. Maybe you can’t make an entire day/weekend of it but maybe you can make a goal to do 1-2 of these things each week. You will feel the benefits immediately and begin to regain your sense of self, as more than just mom.
Check out this post with the FREE printable planner I created to keep you accountable for self care!
A healthy, happy, refreshed, and well-loved woman makes a damn good mom. I’d love to hear your ideas for other self-care activities in the comments!
Farah Zeb is a mother of five, including two children with special needs. She shares practical parenting tips and resources to help other families navigate daily challenges and create supportive, nurturing environments.
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