OP is a 19-year-old non-binary vegetarian who has been pursuing a vegetarian diet for nearly nine years. Initially, their father was unsupportive and ridiculed them when they accidentally fed OP meat. However, their father has since become more compassionate.
Her Father Refused to Go to a Vegan Breakfast Bar
Recently, OP suggested trying a new breakfast bar that they had heard was entirely vegan. Their father objected to the idea and suggested they go somewhere else without giving a reason. Later, OP and their mother visited the breakfast bar and found out that it wasn’t entirely vegan but still had many vegetarian options.
OP’s Mother Wanted to Take Her Husband Some Food Home
OP’s mother decided to bring home a patty melt for OP’s father, but OP objected, stating that it was unfair to bring him food from a place he didn’t want to go to. OP’s mother thought they were being rude by not bringing anything home for their father. OP wonders if they are the ones in the wrong.
The Ridiculous Rational
Readers have taken to their keyboards to highlight some of the ridiculous rational made by OP’s father:
“Have you ever changed your mind about wanting to go to a particular business because they offered more than you thought they did?”
A Person Can Change Their Mind
“If someone offered me dinner at Bob’s House of Ribs, I’d probably say no. I don’t eat meat. If I found out the next week they had a vegan menu, am I not allowed to change my mind if I get another opportunity to eat there?”
There’s No Reason Not to Take Him Food
This commenter is making a good point. They are suggesting that OP’s father simply didn’t know of the non-vegan options on the menu and would likely have been happy with the vegetarian ones. Therefore, there is no reason not to bring him food that he would have been happy to eat.
Readers Tell OP She’s Pushing Her Lifestyle Onto Her Father
Many have replied to their comment to indicate that OP is trying to push their lifestyle onto their father. If this was done in reverse, there would be far graver reactions and consequences. Her father does not have to eat vegan food as much as OP does not have to have meat or animal products.
Your Mum Can Buy Your Dad Food if She Wants
“Was it your mom’s money? Was the food good, and you liked the restaurant?
If either answer is yes, YTA. Mom’s money means she can get Dad what she wants.
If the food was good and you liked the restaurant, then you’d be doing them a disservice by not letting him try it and possibly eat there more.”
Your Mum Can Spend Her Money on What She Wants
Many have also suggested that perhaps the meal was purchased by OP’s mother. In this case, the purchases made for OP’s father should have nothing to do with OP in the first place. If OP’s mother wants to spend their money, then they should be entitled to spend it as they please and for who they want.
Is She Trying to Prevent Her Father from Having a Nice Meal
Additionally, the commenter suggests that OP is trying not to allow their father to have a pleasant meal because of his objections to their veganism. If the food was nice, there should be no reason not to bring some back to their father unless there is some underlying resentment.
Her Father Is Being Petty
Readers have taken to highlight that OP’s father was being petty:
“So it’s okay for him to call you names for not eating meat and for you to go to restaurants with only one veg item, but he couldn’t survive a single meal at a vegan restaurant? Like, be serious.
NTA. Don’t listen to these boneheads.”
Other Readers Agree With This
This commenter is reflecting a sentiment held by many. There are plenty of reasons for a vegan not to want to go to a particular restaurant, but very few for an omnivore.
Her Father Is Being Childish
OP’s father is being childish by not wanting to attend a restaurant because they are thought only to provide vegan food. Vegan food is perfectly healthy and nutritious. Therefore, there is no reason for the father not to go other than underlying resentment.
He’s Being Overly Stubborn and Petty for No Good Reason
Many in the thread believe that the father is being overly stubborn and petty for no good reason. They believe that the OP did the right thing by not allowing him to eat because of his choices.
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