Being a bridesmaid is an honor but can come with a hefty price tag. For one bridesmaid, the expectation to foot a $5K bill to attend her best friend’s destination wedding in Sicily has left her feeling furious and financially drained. While she wants to celebrate her friend’s special day, the cost is too high.
An irritated bridesmaid spoke on Reddit’s Am I The A**hole (AITA) this week to vent about her friend who is getting married and is expecting contributions to her Sicilian wedding.
The wedding is planned for August this year in the picturesque region of Taormina in Sicily. It is expected to cost a whopping 5k (UK pounds). The woman told Reddit users that her friend expects her to contribute between 3k and 5k to attend, leaving her feeling ‘unappreciated.’
Bridesmaid Claims the Bride is ‘Well-Off”
What makes the situation all the more infuriating is that the bridesmaid says that her friend is well-off and does not have to work. While the idea of a dream detention wedding is amazing for the bride and groom, the idea that those attending the wedding have to contribute is concerning for many.
The original poster (OP) talked of people flying in from all around the world, including Canada (where she is traveling from) and London, and that “They chose a five-star hotel for the venue. I believed they would be taking care of lodging for the bridal party because of the extravagance and location.”
The Bride Claims That The Cannot Cover Additional Hotel Charges
The bride informed her guests that the hotel added charges for exclusive hotel rentals. Hence, she needed them to contribute to the wedding.
The OP also shared details that the bridesmaids were expected to wear gold shoes and jewelry and pay for their hair and make-up to be done.
It was also noted that the bridal party would not be attending a dinner on the eve of the wedding, and there are no other activities planned for the week they are expected to stay.
The Couple has booked a 31k Honeymoon Safari.
To rub salt into the wounds, while the OP will need to take a week off work unpaid, the happy couple has booked an expensive safari for their honeymoon that costs 31k. Of course, to the OP, this screams selfishness. She is already sore that her friend threw shade on her hen-do plans after the bride accused her location as ‘dirty and untasteful.’
Reddit Readers Offered Support
We are sure that the women felt a lot of relief when Reddit users hopped on the comments to support her when they said things like, “That’s a LOT of expenses out of pocket, and you’re certainly NTA for not wanting to pay. That bachelorette party bit is just rude, she really should’ve kept that to herself”. Another said, “Mamma mia, that’s another level of expensive! NTA if you bail.”
One Reddit fan could not believe the money the bride expected her guests to pay, saying, “My whole wedding cost 10k (my husband and I paid for it all)- I WOULD NOT SPEND THAT AMOUNT FOR SOMEONE ELSES WEDDING!”
We can’t shake the feeling that the bride does not understand that everyone else may not be as well-off as her and that she should not expect everyone to attend such an expensive wedding. It is great if some friends and family members can afford the trip, but not all have much disposable income.
One user offers this advice to the OP “It doesn’t matter (as much) whether the couple is rich or not, don’t go if this will create hardship and/or resentment for you. You don’t need a detailed explanation either, “my situation changed and I am not longer able to attend” and if you feel like it “but I would love to celebrate with you separately another time.”
We cannot help but agree with that last comment, and we hope that the OP comes to some agreement with her friend.