Our behaviors and habits affect our mood and well-being. If you find that you need an increase in happiness in your life, look at if you have any of these toxic habits.
Overthinking
Do you tend to replay the same negative situation in your head? It’s like a mental Groundhog Day in which you relive the past. Anger, resentment, and hatred stir their hot embers in your heart. Try to interrupt your thinking by having a distraction such as watching your favorite show. Awareness of how you are responding also can help you in the longer term.
Procrastination
There are things you know you want or need to do. Yet, you just can’t.be.bothered. Procrastination can have you feeling guilty and ashamed of yourself. Thinking of the enormity of the task at hand can be overwhelming and scary, which may demotivate you. Break the task down into smaller, manageable steps. Then. go for it. Reward yourself along the way as you meet each micro-goal.
Comparing Yourself To Others
Social comparison can either make or break you. If you compare yourself to those who have a lifestyle better than yours, then envy and jealousy rear their heads. Those who are struggling in life make you feel like things are that bad for you after all. The issue with comparing yourself with others is that you are constantly using it as a litmus test for your life. Stop this toxic behavior and compare yourself with…yourself. How have you positively changed yourself and your life?
Self-deprecating Talk
Putting yourself down is an indicator of your low self-worth. When people compliment you or congratulate you, its a hard pill to swallow and you brush it off as “It really isn’t that great”. Turn your self-talk around by looking at the positives in your personality. Focus on those things that your friends say they love about you.
Keeping Grudges
We are all imperfect human beings prone to making mistakes. Holding a grudge against a past slight not only robs you of your happiness and joy, but it can also destroy relationships that you value. Overcome your grudges by practicing empathy and try to see things from the other person’s point of view.
Putting Yourself Last
You may think that putting others first shows that you love and care for those around you. Honestly ask yourself “How happy am I when I put myself last?” Your actions may scream out that you don’t value yourself. If you truly care about people, then put yourself first (not in an arrogant way). Remember, air stewards always tell you to put your oxygen mask on first before you help those around you. You can’t assist others if you and your life is in a bad spot.
Perfectionism
Here is a mask that you put on to hide your flaws. You can’t let other people know you are a vulnerable human being that can make mistakes. Your happiness hinges on things being 100% perfect. That’s a lot of pressure to put on yourself and those you care about. To let go of your perfectionism, be aware of the psychological drives behind the motivation. Learn that it’s okay to be less-than-perfect. Mistakes are a part of life and that’s okay.
Having A Busy Life
Being busy could be your way of escaping a deeper issue you have. You don’t have time for developing a long-term relationship. There may be a need for admiration from those around you who see your busyness. Eventually, you will experience mental, emotional, and physical burnout. Learn to slow down. Mindfulness is one option worth exploring.
Being A People-pleaser
We all long for approval. For those who have a personal history in which approval was lacking, then they seek it from others. The deep insecurity that has developed needs to be soothed. That is done by saying “Yes” to everyone around you so that you can keep them happy and receive recognition from them. Your shattered ego gets a boost and you tell yourself “I’m wanted and needed”. To overcome this issue, learn to approve and love yourself.
Making Quick Conclusions
How quickly do you come to a conclusion once you hear a story or some juicy rumor? Our personal biases and prejudices feed us the information that we base our final opinion. Yet, how accurate is our assessment? Remember, there are always two or more sides to a story. Become more open-minded and listen to all the facts, then make your decision.
Not Sleeping
Sleep is restorative. It allows our minds and bodies to rest and recharge. When you’re tired, your thinking gets foggy and your emotions are all over the place. Just look at how grumpy kids get when they haven’t had a nap. Sleep and…be happy.
Making Excuses
Excuses are a defense we use when people attack us. They are the bricks that build up a wall around our egos. They allow us to maintain the status quo in our lives. Next time you make an excuse, stop and consider why you did it.
Dwelling In The Past
A nostalgic reflection of the past can be good. Living in the past and wishing that things now would be like they were “back then” robs you of enjoying the present moment. Additionally, if your past is full of horrific and tragic events, then you are opening the floodgates for negative emotions to flow out of. The past is the past. You need to let it go. It can be hard to do so, but not impossible. Exploring the benefits of mindfulness is one technique that may help.
Being A Control Freak
Control is born out of insecurity. When you are in charge of people and things around you, then you can feel safe. You know what is going to happen and you can control the outcomes. The world around you is one that is familiar and there are no nasty surprises to shock you. To overcome your need for control, look at what motivates the desire. Take baby steps to be less controlling.
Drinking Too Much
Excessive drinking can be an indicator that you are trying to numb emotional pain. There are plenty of support groups such as AA that can help you learn healthier ways to cope with life.
No Boundaries
When you have no boundaries, then your life becomes a free-for-all. How do you know what you like or don’t like? You let any person into your life. There is no clear direction for your life or those within it. It’s a life filled with anarchy and confusion. Stop, take a deep breath, and then wonder if you truly are happy living such a life. Boundaries are things that protect you by placing a guard around your emotional, psychological and physical well-being.
Obsessed With Negativity
Some people are only happy if others around them are miserable. They can’t stand it when people are happy. Such individuals are hurting at a profound level. Address the pain within you with empathy and compassion.
Blaming Others
Blame shifting puts the other person at fault. You are on the pedestal looking all angelic and perfect. You don’t need to change because you think you did nothing wrong. Blaming others is toxic and relationship-destroying.
16 ANNOYING PHRASES THAT MAKE PEOPLE IMMEDIATELY HATE YOU!
We wanted to know the most irksome things someone can say that turns you off! These online users didn’t hold back! 16 ANNOYING PHRASES THAT MAKE PEOPLE IMMEDIATELY HATE YOU!
OBSOLETE MILLENNIALS: 14 SKILLS THEY LEARNED IN THE 90S THAT HAVE NO PLACE IN TODAY’S WORLD
A lot has changed since the turn of the century – just ask this nostalgic lot!
OBSOLETE MILLENNIALS: 14 SKILLS THEY LEARNED IN THE 90S THAT HAVE NO PLACE IN TODAY’S WORLD
THE FALL FROM GRACE: 12 PROFESSIONS THAT WERE ONCE REVERED, NOW A TOTAL JOKE
These 12 professions that are now obsolete show how much the times have changed.
THE FALL FROM GRACE: 12 PROFESSIONS THAT WERE ONCE REVERED, NOW A TOTAL JOKE
FROM ‘OKAY BOOMER’ TO ‘UGH BOOMER’: 10 HABITS THAT IRRITATE MILLENNIALS
Each generation has its quirks. Most label it as an “old person thing” when asked why grandpa or grandma does something unusual. The defense from the other side is that “it was the way things were back in our day.”
FROM ‘OKAY BOOMER’ TO ‘UGH BOOMER’: 10 HABITS THAT IRRITATE MILLENNIALS